How long have you been depressed?

[Rain]

How long have you been suffering of depression. Does anyone in your surroundings know you do?

(These questions may have asked before but they are lost somewhere again and well, I like talking sometimes so I don't mind being asked anything

Well, I think I got depressed when I was here. I had it a little when I lived abroad but I didnt notice. It was just moderately. Sometimes I wanted to hide or skip classes but it was nothing as severe as it got to be when we came to live here in Europe. The reasons for my depression were on the streets, at home, in voices and all the words that were spoken to me. And then I didn't focus on the 'now' anymore but also on the past, about things that happened and I kind of came to think that... 'I deserved all these things'. (My jouth was not what it was supposed to be though I had my happy moments even sometimes I must think hard to find these them).

If I have to really choose.. then maybe more than 5 years. Or maybe more as depression and suicide were words that I did not know existed. I thought being gloomy sometimes was normal.

How about you?

By the way, my family don't really know I am depressed but I think I have it from my father. He is can be really gloomy and also has explotions of anger (which I sort of have... I'm not proud of it and at that moment you'd better not aproach me as I am in the lowest position I can ever be, feeling very horrible). My mum is watching Oprah, so she is now starting to understand that her daughter is not doing great and she's praying for me everyday (I am not exaggerating, she's quite religious).

[megoboom]

well i hadda answer quick cuz i gotta go soon ya i had it for awhile i dont really remember and it was not like a direct oo this is what is happening it is more like i didnt understand it at the time so really it is hard for me to tell exactly when

[kittyclub2005]

Same here. I dunno when it started, but I've had it for a while.

[Rain]

What is awhile? A year? A month? Two days? Or two weeks? I am exalting (karma) you kitty, for being pregnant again =) That's really so lovely, I wish you all the best (for you and the baby)!

[megoboom]

aaww congrats kitty im not sure if i knew that but ya congrats thinking back i had it all through college and all through high school and some of middle school so bout 8 years im not sure though mathmatically i had it 10 years so i dunno

[presh]

yeah, i think i had it on and off growing up....then officially recognized it 4 years ago at college. oh, but i remember all those nights crying myself to sleep in junior high and high school....thinking something was terribly wrong with me....but things are a lot better now....

congratulations kitty! i hope all goes well during the pregnancy.

[Rain]

I was sort of in the same position with you at school/highschool etc. I was very gloomy and would spend a lot of times on my own. Not as if I had any other option.

[kittyclub2005]

Um . . . I'd say since since I was 12. That makes it 5 years. Thank you Rain for the karma. This baby is driving me crazy.

[Rain]

Isn't that cute! Gosh, I think I'm getting too.. involved but it's really like I'm going to become a mum too, somehow it makes me happy. I think if I were about to get pregnant the coming months or anything lol (not that I expect it to happen), I will be very happy and wondering how the baby will look like, also hoping it will be this little girl.. I wouldn't be depressed again I think, I have a child to take care of and that's more important than my own life. Taking care of another soul, helping it become this beautiful individual.

[kittyclub2005]

True.

[missbrackish]

How long have you been suffering of depression. Does anyone in your surroundings know you do?

I've been suffering for as long as I can remember. I think since I was like 9. Im sure everyone knows, I dont really try to hide it. My parents have put me on anti-deppresants before a few times, but I always run out than they wont get me a refill.

[Rain]

Wow. Have you seen that these anti-depressivants work? I was also put on medication but stopped abruptly. I really couldn't see myself taking the amount and constant different ones that I got. I felt like I was giving to a slow torture of my organs. You were really young when you first got depressed.

I thought the doctor would give you a prescription which would have you return to the drugstore for a refill, that way you don't have to go to the doctor constantly. That's how it is here, at least.

[kittyclub2005]

I told my doctor that my depression is getting worse, I mean, i'm suffering from panic attacks.

[Paco]

do you take anti dep. while pregnant? if not what have they suggested?

[Rain]

I'm not sure... but to my accord medication during pregnancy should be used carefully. You can't take everything...