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Post by Rain on Jul 1, 2005 7:38:54 GMT -5
If I say I cut because of everything and anything, it would appear I do it daily but I don't. However, I always find any reason to give in to self-injury. I mean, maybe someone who just gave me a dirty look even it wasn't really meant for me but someone who stood behind me. When I triple over, I get embarrassed and I feel like cutting, I mean.. over anything.
I would select all the options and also other. Or a combination of these.
It's the same today. I saw this foreign guy at the store, while I walked my way home wearing a hat and this thick jacket (I am cold!), I felt very humiliated and ashamed the way he looked at me, I misinterpret everything, I know. But all I could think about when I left the mall was... 'bleed, bleed, bleed, bleed, bleed'. All the way home, it's like a mantra to give me spirit and to keep me going. It disappeared at home..
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Paco
Official member
Posts: 128
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Post by Paco on Jul 12, 2005 1:43:08 GMT -5
i think that to a point i am probably the same way except that it gets twisted around for a while till i it's all rage towards myself. but with the poll i was a little dissapointed that i only got one vote, as i would have chosen several. j/k
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Post by Rain on Sept 14, 2005 4:12:18 GMT -5
Nice sense of humor. I try nowadays not to slice so much, especially over anyone, only when I feel bad which is something personal with myself and not because of others. People don't care if you're wounded or know so, why would you hurt yourself, I wonder now.
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Post by Chickas on Sept 19, 2005 19:20:04 GMT -5
i cut when i just need to feel. sometimes i may be feeling to much and the only way to hush those feelings are to cut. sometimes i just want to make sure that im still alive because i cant feel.
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Paco
Official member
Posts: 128
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Post by Paco on Sept 19, 2005 20:23:23 GMT -5
Chickas you are so tapping in to my thoughts exactly. I hope it is not this way for you today.
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Post by Chickas on Sept 19, 2005 21:10:54 GMT -5
unfortunatley today it is. im just numb right now, i want to feel something, make sure that im still alive, watch my blood flow to try to make me forget about everything else.
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Post by Rain on Sept 20, 2005 4:03:51 GMT -5
Hopefully you feel better afterwards. I was going to do it yesterday too but I was too tired, I was feeling more sick and it took over and kept me in bed, instead of seeking blades. I think cutting is starting to loose meaning for me. But nothing hurts more than feeling pain and being unable to release. I tend to let it all increase for some mysterious reason that I'm always sad. At least, I'm not cutting.. to the relief of others.
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zero
Newbie
Bid my blood to run before I come undone
Posts: 22
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Post by zero on Nov 25, 2005 13:34:39 GMT -5
i cut when i just need to feel. sometimes i may be feeling to much and the only way to hush those feelings are to cut. sometimes i just want to make sure that im still alive because i cant feel. That is exactly how I feel. I lose all feeling and can't even feel my own cuts. I just feel so... lost. I don't know who I am any more. |
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Post by degora on May 1, 2006 14:14:37 GMT -5
Hey. I signed up a while ago and I'm just now posting for the first time. I used to have to cut because I thought I couldn't feel anything, but now I realise that I just blocked it out. I also have o.d.'d a few times and tried other stuff. I think I might be getting okay. It's been almost two weeks and it hasn't been as frequent as it used to be since I was put on Zoloft. I'm starting to lose it though. I recently had the worst week of my life and I still CONSTANTLY think about it. And then today... This morning I found out that my best friend is in the hospital. I want to do something so bad... just anything so that I don't have to deal with the thought that something might happen to her. I've already had to deal with heartbreak from her and see her go through so much, but I can't stand the thought of being without her. I don't know what else to say. If you can help in any way, please do. *Sorry for such an intense first message.
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Twisted
Newbie
It's just me warped and twisted
Posts: 4
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Post by Twisted on Sept 17, 2006 18:30:43 GMT -5
I do it when I feel like s*** Usually after my dad yells at me. I'm mad at him but I take my anger out on myself instead. Then it got to the point where I did it at every little thing. When I couldn't be good enough. Sort of as a punishment. I use to also do it at school when people would make fun of me. Now it's just back to when I get yelled at.
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Post by princess on Sept 19, 2006 11:02:53 GMT -5
I do it because of everything
I don't know whether that would make sense to you or not
but constantly I wish I could just tear me up and throw me away
self harm is my own little way of doing that
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